Late to the post but I found this one moving. It also reflects many of my thoughts as I've become a mother. Much to my children's chagrin, we are making them go to weekly language school and I am pushing for them to go to religious classes once a week once old enough. I tell my husband I want to provide scaffolding for my children so that they can build upon their ethnic and religious roots. Continuity with the past and our ancestry is important, especially in a modern world where everyone is always focused on the future.
My parents had an interesting take. Soviet immigrants, they ended up sending me to a religious orthodox school in the US. This was quite difficult for me, as I became more religious than them, and also often felt shame. Then I chose to go to a secular school and over time, became less religious (actually becoming and choosing not be religious were instantaneous, but the practice gains steam and drops away at a slower rate - for example, I still do not eat pig). Then later, my mother became religious and would get frustrated that I wasn't. I ended up marrying someone jewish who is not super interested in keeping the practice, so I probably have more dispute with him than I would with my Colombian boyfriend who wanted to convert to Judaism. All that being said, the Jewish practice is varied, and with different levels of religiousness, can make t very hard to match the "practice" of Judaism even within a family, especially when the practice is new generationally speaking.
Misha, a gitten moed! I got here via Scott Alexander. I'm enjoying your posts, especially this one. Forgive the naked self-promotion, but I've written a book called Judaism Straight Up: Why Real Religion Endures that I think will resonate. This review in the Jewish Review of Books should give you the flavor: https://jewishreviewofbooks.com/articles/9532/when-heidi-met-shimen/
Sydney Beit Din is Chabad / Orthodox. We were going to a shul with a chabad rabbi, now just orthodox, (we moved house) but no real difference. Feel free to get in touch if you'd like to discuss - happy to share experience.
Sorry - I apparently don't know how to Substack and never realized that you responded! I would love to hear more about your journey. My wife and I are trying to figure this whole thing out, especially since none of our close relatives are observant either.
Late to the post but I found this one moving. It also reflects many of my thoughts as I've become a mother. Much to my children's chagrin, we are making them go to weekly language school and I am pushing for them to go to religious classes once a week once old enough. I tell my husband I want to provide scaffolding for my children so that they can build upon their ethnic and religious roots. Continuity with the past and our ancestry is important, especially in a modern world where everyone is always focused on the future.
Thanks!
Absolutely beautiful piece - thank you for writing it.
🙏
My parents had an interesting take. Soviet immigrants, they ended up sending me to a religious orthodox school in the US. This was quite difficult for me, as I became more religious than them, and also often felt shame. Then I chose to go to a secular school and over time, became less religious (actually becoming and choosing not be religious were instantaneous, but the practice gains steam and drops away at a slower rate - for example, I still do not eat pig). Then later, my mother became religious and would get frustrated that I wasn't. I ended up marrying someone jewish who is not super interested in keeping the practice, so I probably have more dispute with him than I would with my Colombian boyfriend who wanted to convert to Judaism. All that being said, the Jewish practice is varied, and with different levels of religiousness, can make t very hard to match the "practice" of Judaism even within a family, especially when the practice is new generationally speaking.
All resonates! My family were also soviet immigrants. Good luck!
Misha, a gitten moed! I got here via Scott Alexander. I'm enjoying your posts, especially this one. Forgive the naked self-promotion, but I've written a book called Judaism Straight Up: Why Real Religion Endures that I think will resonate. This review in the Jewish Review of Books should give you the flavor: https://jewishreviewofbooks.com/articles/9532/when-heidi-met-shimen/
I'm happy to send you a copy.
Wonderful, thanks I'll check it out! A gitten moed!
Are you doing this progression with Chabad? A modern orthodox shul? Something else?
My wife and I are at the beginning of a similar journey. Thanks!
Sydney Beit Din is Chabad / Orthodox. We were going to a shul with a chabad rabbi, now just orthodox, (we moved house) but no real difference. Feel free to get in touch if you'd like to discuss - happy to share experience.
Sorry - I apparently don't know how to Substack and never realized that you responded! I would love to hear more about your journey. My wife and I are trying to figure this whole thing out, especially since none of our close relatives are observant either.